Tuesday, December 19, 2006

A Killer Gift

It's Angie with you today. With a word for my friend Bev.

Love at first sight? Not quite. Bev gave me a dog. She thought she was being helpful. After the murder and all in Kanner Lake, she felt I needed protection. What I need is a friend who asks what I want before she takes it upon herself to give it to me. I mean, a dog is almost like a child. It wants love, attention, and someone to clean up its dookey.

I don't like dookey. I never have. I told Bev that I appreciated the thought and love behind it. I know she worries about me, but good grief, there was nothing to worry about before. No one was bothering me. I came and went as I pleased without incident.

Now, if I want to go out, I have to make sure Killer has water and food. Then I have to watch the clock like a worried mother. Have I been gone too long? Will Killer be lonely? Will Killer be hungry? Will Killer soil my cream berber carpet?

It turns out Killer has a bit of a weak bladder. When he gets excited, well... As far as I know, they don't make doggie Depends. Killer also likes to nibble my toes when I sleep. Bev thinks it's just the sweetest. I think it wakes me up with nightmares of being devoured by a bear. Scares the pants off me every morning!

I tried to take Killer back right after Bev left him and his leash with me. But once we got to the animal shelter, I couldn't leave him there. I saw all those other pathetic looking pups looking up at me with their sad eyes, hoping I was their salvation ... and then I looked down at Killer.

It probably defied the odds that he should be rescued from such a place. Imagine his relief at the moment that Bev chose him. But then to be brought back. Rejected. I just couldn't do that to him.

I guess he's good for a lot of things besides worrying me to death on whether or not I'm a suitable parent, er, dog-owner. He's a great snuggler. He lies right in bed with me. He's so warm. And he does bark like crazy whenever Bev or anyone else tries to sneak up on me. I can tell you no one would ever hurt his mama.

Okay, so I love Killer. I do. I admit it. And to thank Bev for giving me the best present I've ever received, I've decided to surprise her with one in return ... Mwahaha.

Posted by ~ Bailey Truitt @ 7:00 AM
Does this mean you got a dog at the shelter for Bev? Now THAT would be an interesting turn of events...
Posted by Anonymous elizabeth monty : 8:46 PM
Naw. She got Bev a horse.
Posted by Anonymous burt laroy : 8:46 PM
I was going to suggest a donkey...
Posted by Anonymous larry cellaway : 9:33 AM
I can hardly wait to see what you give her, Angie! It could be a Christmas to remember :-)
Posted by Blogger Lynetta : 9:39 AM
You know, little lady, they have those things called Pooper-Scoopers. Real handy little devices for..ah, those little "treats" your new present leaves for ya. I think the little fella will grow on ya.

Jumpin Joel
Posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 11:19 AM
Dogs are awesome. Mine about drove me crazy chewing through my couch, endtable, new blueberry bush but she calmed down and now is a cherished part of our family.

Get Bev a donkey? I wonder where you buy one of those. (No, I'm not suggesting that would be a good present.)
Posted by Blogger Gina Holmes : 12:42 PM
Quit your blustering, Angie! I was right and you know it. Just admit it for once.
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