Friday, July 21, 2006
Why I Am Here
Some people don't know how to say no.
Unfortunately, I am one of them, and the residents of Kanner Lake know it. Do you need a volunteer to oversee Kanner Lake Senior High News? Ask Mrs. Trexel. Do you need a leader for the library's bookclub? Ask Beverly. Or do you need a ladies luncheon coordinator? Ask Bev. Therefore, when I retired from teaching English, I vowed I would learn to say no.
Then Bailey Truitt sought writers for this new blog (what illiterate coined that term?).
At first I wasn't even tempted. I have successfully avoided all excessive involvement for several years now, and I was not about to start again. Chatrooms, instant messaging, blogs--these are the younger generations' excuse for sloppy English and wasted time. "Not interested," I told Bailey. "I don't read blogs, and I will certainly never write for one."
But to quote my granddaughter's favorite movie, "Never say never."1
Then my dear friend Angie, whom you met yesterday (honestly, sometimes I don't know how I put up with her) overheard my comments. She told me the only reason I refused Bailey was because of fear: "An old lady set in her ways, buffaloed by new technology."
Of course she was wrong, and I gave her my full lecture on slander. All she did was laugh and say, "You're chicken."
"I am not."
Folding her arms, she leaned back like a rebellious student. "Prove it. I dare you."
Obviously, I ended up saying yes. Only heaven knows what I'll find to write about. Perhaps we shall discuss classic literature. Some of you may find that very interesting. But if you find my writing a bore, the full responsibility for my being here in the first place lies on Angie's shoulders.
I take that back. Twenty-five percent is my husband's fault. But that is a story for another time.
-- Beverly Trexel
P.S. I apologize to my fellow English teachers for any unorthodox punctuation and paragraphing forced upon this and all future essays due to their appearing in this low form of writing known as a Web log.
1An American Tail. Dir. Don Bluth. Perf. Phillip Glasser, Dom DeLuise, Nehemiah Persoff, Ercia Yohn, Amy Green, and John Finnegan. Universal Studios, 1986.
I would love a discussion on classic literature. Perhaps it would lead to a book discussion group that could meet at Java Joint and talk about books over latte? That would make a nice story in the paper's What-to-do-in-Kanner-Lake section. By the way, your blog attitude reminds me of my mom's when microwaves first came out. I bought her one for Christmas, but she insisted it would give her cancer and refused to use it. The thing sat on her counter untouched for years, until one night I stopped by and saw a bag of popped microwave popcorn on the counter. Once she got started she loved it, and I think you- a fine educated writer- will love this blogging thing too. Glad you decided to give it a chance!
Jared
How about coming over for just a slice and a cup of coffee? Or better yet, I'll buy at Java Joint.
Literature...what a great idea for a discussion. See, like I said, it's not so scary!
Instead of classical literature, why don't we discuss some of your local and nearby authors. I think there's one not too far from you in Coeur D'Alene who writes Christian suspense. Who knows, she might let you interview her? Of course, talking about spiders and body counts may be too much for you. I remember how you screamed when I left that fake spider on your desk. Actually, I really enjoyed your classes, and I'm really sorry for all those pranks I pulled on you.
Your former student,
Larry Brown
I'll be happy to read your manuscript, even if Bev won't help. I used to love the Twilight Zone and Outer Limits. I hope you don't mind that the last science fiction I read was "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea".
Angie
Great to hear from you.
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